156; Uncle Albert's Mountain,(The Lure;) Chapter XXIII; Tom Leaves

 

  Everyone seems to care so much about what I do, that I’m letting you know what my plans are. I caught the last Greyhound out of Frisco into Vail. I’m going to finish the season with some friends there. I appreciate all that you’ve done for me, Joe. All the Mother Hens that converge on me in Summit County are driving me crazy. I have my own life, and I can’t take everyone telling me how to live it. I wish you all the Luck with whatever you may find in the future. You have a really bad deal going, Joe, I tried all I know how to do. I hope our paths will someday cross again. Toby ‘Point em downhill and stand on em.’ Sara, you deserve better, I’ll write once I get myself sorted out. This is not the way I wanted any of it to turn out.

 

                                                                                                    Tom Dillion

 

     Joe set Tom’s letter down on his desk. Sipping at his mug of coffee, he missed Tom already. He felt he had failed somehow, if he only could have kept his mountain. He might have been able to teach the boy how to look at life differently, how to deal with his problems instead of running away, exactly as he had done when he was young. When you don’t like the way things are going, you pick up and head into the next mountain. Once you have done it, and are no longer afraid, you see how easy it really is. You leave them all behind. It’s what had drawn him to Arapahoe Basin in the first place, that and the Ski Patrol. He was the ultimate escapist. His wife of ten years had wanted a divorce because they were unable to have children, his parents were getting a divorce because they were never in love. The last thing he remembered was his sister saying to him,” They only stayed together for us. They were never in love. They got married because they were having you. He knew it to be true, he hated her for telling him. It seems she always made things worse than they actually were, kick him when he was down. He had run away, and never looked back. Now, he was paying the price, no one to turn to, no one to be there. You had better damn well be ready to pay the price when it comes due.

 

     “Joe?” Toby’s blonde head appeared around the corner of the door. “Have you seen Tom?”

     “He’s gone, he left. The kid can’t take the heat.” Joe held up the letter for Toby to read.

     “Damn,” Toby read through the note. He let his arm fall limply to his side.

     “I think it’s all my fault,” Toby confessed.

     “It’s nobody’s fault. He’s a runner. He always runs, never stays and deals with anything.”

 

     Joe leaned back in his chair, folded his arms across has chest, and stared out the window, at the massive mountainside.He rocked gently in his chair. Toby stood in silence and looked out into the distance with Joe. He didn’t want to loose Tom. He was his best friend. There are only a few people who become best friends. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath, fighting back the tears. Tom had to come back. He just had too. He had too.

Om Mani Padme Hum, Deva Premal

155;Uncle Albert's Mountain,( The Lure;) Chapter XXII; The Olympic Training

 

 

Before you act, you have freedom, but after you act, the effect of that action will follow you whether you like it or not. That is the law of Karma. You are a free agent, but once you perform a certain act, you will reap the results of that act.

Paramahansa Yogananda, SRF Lessons

 

 

      Tom had spent the last three weeks on the mountain with Toby. He was helping him set up a training program. Giving him confidence and motivation to train harder, ever harder as the trials grew nearer. Toby’s heart was in the right place, he was lacking the timing and style. Running the courses had to be routine, repetition would lead to speed. Tom realized this and tried to motivate him to face his toughest challenges. The Olympics were not just another NASTAR Race. They were a series of steps, any of which, if you stumble, you’ve lost. No second chances, no excuses. After running the courses, they would run  trails on the Basin, a daunting challenge. Finishing up on the East Wall of Lenawee Mountain where there were no trails, only wide open endless powder turns.

 

     "The highest lift operated mountain in North America, a gold medal at the Olympics,” he’d yell over and over. He was trying to fill his heart and soul with the spirit of the mountain itself. He spoke of Joe and the years of hard work and toil he had put in to own the mountain, trying to make him see the results of dreams, grandiose dreams, dreams that can be if you have the desire to reach and grab for the rings.

     “They’re not going to just give you that medal, you have to earn it! Simply wanting it is not good enough. You have to desire it with every fiber of your being. It’s all you can focus on, nothing else can matter or exist. GOLDEN DREAMS! GOLDEN DREAMS! OLYMPIC GOLD!”

     Tom was relentless with Toby, but he knew Toby needed him. Now more than ever, the sheer spectacle of the rock spires looming high above the rest of the world, left them both in awe Toby needed the push, his skiing was getting really good. Tom knew he had a definite place and shot at the Olympics. All the effort and hard work was for him. Tom would talk of himself and his own reservations about life.

     “At least you know what you want,” he’d say. “You have a single vision, you can see it. TO BE THE BEST OF THE BEST! THE CRÈME De La CRÈME! No one can ever take that away from you. Don’t take it away from yourself! Hold on to your dreams, Tobe. It’s always just your dreams, hold on to them as if they were your child, your only child”

 

     The days were hard and long, the nights short and sleepless. Every waking hour he spent either skiing or discussing the various conditions. They spent days on the courses of Keystone, Copper and Breckenridge, covering all aspects of the different pitched slopes. The angle and texture of the snow the sun made on the downside of the moguls was extremely important. Where the shadows fell on the courses determined where the hidden ice would lay. A single slip would cost precious seconds. Vertical drop, base elevation, they all came into play. They found some hard pack groomed ice at Keystone down the road. Luckily the weather stayed dry and cold, Toby could spend more time running drilling on the hard pack cover.

 

       Tom enjoyed these days spent with Toby. They gave him a chance to get away from all the questions that had been stirring through his mind. The mountains themselves were the only stability left in Tom’s shifting world. No longer did Tom see things as “Black and White.” There were feelings in his heart, thoughts in his mind he had never had before. He was beginning to let other people in his heart and life. They were helping to shape his destiny. They were letting him into their worlds. He was finally beginning to grow up.

 

     The sharp white peaks thrusting up boldly around him were like old friends to him. He had spent countless days and years with nothing on his mind but their beauty and honesty. They were a timeless vision, always changing, yet always remaining the same. The mountains have always been and always will be. Tom felt lucky to be able to share a small part of their history.

    Toby was becoming increasingly irritable. He rarely said a word as Tom tried to push him harder to make every second count. Timing every run as if it was life or death. Tom yelled at each mistake, telling him if he wanted to claim gold, he would have to work harder. Toby reacted but was beginning to falter. He was angry and fed up with skiing, stopwatches and Tom.

     “Forget it!” Toby yelled, “I’m through for the day. I can’t take you riding me anymore.”

     “I simply said…”

     “I know what you said. You said it yesterday and you said it the day before. I’m sick of it Tom. I’m sick of it all.”

     “You can’t expect to…”

     “I don’t expect anything. I don’t even know why I’m doing this anymore. You do nothing but criticize my every move. You’re a royal pain in the ass.”

     “I’m only doing it for you.”

     “You’re doing this because you love it. You love being in control. You’ve never had anything, and think you can take my dreams and make them your own.”

     “Bull crap! You’re pissed off because you can’t take the pressure. You’re a lazy whining, God damned baby.”

     “Piss Off Tom!”

     Toby whirled around and took off down the mountain, leaving Tom wondering what had just happened.

     “I can’t believe this, every time I turn around, I get kicked in the ass. Well no more.”

 

     He turned and started tucking down the headwall toward the Pallivacini, his speed increasing as he sped along the hanging cornice that had formed above the bowl. Not knowing what he was going to do next, first David, Then Sara and now Toby. Why couldn’t they take him for what he was, without asking for everything? He never took any more than he could give. Everyone had to have it their own way. All or nothing at all, wasn’t that the motto. No one is ever satisfied with what they have. He was disillusioned with it all.

     “I’ve got to get out of here,’ he said, feeling there was nothing left to fight for. At the last second he turned, and flew off the top of the cornice catching incredible air. Tom landed with his tips slightly crossed at break- neck speed. It caused him to go head over skis and begin tumbling down the steep slope. Every time he came up he feared he would break his neck on the next roll as he drove his head deep into the endless powder. On one of the upright rolls, Tom threw his weight to his left and landed on his shoulder. It drove it in to the snow and arrested his fall. His skis had not come off, and he stood shakily his knees weak his breath coming in spurts and gasps. He was utterly exhausted and weak, Tom thought of Joe’s struggle to keep the Basin and his friends and the confusion in his life. In utter exasperation, he cried out, ”Is their no justice in this world?” Almost immediately he heard an answer a voice that said, “Be a Teacher!” Confused, he looked around to see where the voice had come from. There was nothing but silence in the vast natural mountainous bowl. He dusted himself off and turned his skis downhill and pushed hard with his poles. Determined to see what his destiny was, now that he had cheated death. A half a century would pass before Tom would fully comprehend what the edict in the wilderness truly meant.

Gayatri Mantra, Deva Premal and Miten

154; Uncle Albert's Mountain,(The Lure;) Chapter XXI; Sara and Tom

   Sara sat nervously tapping her nails on the end table. She was confused. Tom had called and told her he’d be a little late tonight. It had given her a chance to work out a few last minute questions she had about her relationship.

     “I could easily see spending the rest of my life with him,” she said to herself. “He’s everything I’ve always wanted in a man. If he could just learn to settle down, how can I love someone who might be here one minute and climbing and skiing the French Alps the next?”

 

     Reaching up, she pulled a few strands of her hair, noticing some split ends that would have to be trimmed. Crossing her legs, she shifted her weight on the couch and glanced at the clock. He’s not the kind that likes demands made on him. She knew that but she just had to voice them. She wasn’t getting any younger and wanted desperately to know where her life was going to go.

 

     A family had always been her only dream. Two, maybe three children, and a nine to five husband, picnics on weekends, It really wasn’t too much to ask. Maybe Tom wants that also, maybe he just was never in love enough before to commit himself. They had many intimate late night talks about their feelings for each other, and had discussed their past failures. They understood each other’s desires and needs. Their basic personalities were perfect. Not once had a conflict arisen that wasn’t resolved equitably between them. Their love making was more than she had ever hoped for. He was a lover that was gentle, a man, but still her little boy. She could be herself holding nothing back, not hiding even the smallest fantasy from him. The night she cried in his arms, she knew she loved him. Sara needed all of him.

 

     “Sara,” she heard him call as he tapped lightly on her door. She went to the door and opened it.

     “Hi baby,” he smiled, “Sorry I’m late.”

     “Hi, “ she walked to Tom and gave him a hug.

We had a big meeting at the Basin. Joe sold the mountain and he finally broke the news to everyone.,” he sighed looking deeply in her eyes.

     “No!,” Sara stepped back., the smile disappearing from her face.

     “Can you believe it? Everything he has worked so hard for is gone. Shuffled across someone’s desk like it was no more than the paper it was printed on.”

 Sara could feel Tom’s bitter disappointment, and she tightly held him in her arms.

     “I feel just like I did when my parents got divorced. The finality of family, separating, the same pain and utter disappointment.”

     “Everyone was family up there,” she knew all of them and how very close they were.

     “The thing that’s tough on me is how casual Joe is about it. He’s just letting it go. Everyone feels betrayed.”

     “Well, he’s naturally the one you are going to blame. I think that when the news settles in, you’ll realize he’s the same man as before. Think of how much he loves the mountain. He gave you the gift of it. I feel it in your heart.”

     “Yeah, I guess you're right. It’s just awfully hard,” he leaned over and gave her a small affectionate kiss. “Thanks babe.”

     “For what?”

     “Just for being there.”

 

     They were deeply in love. When they were together, there was no one else around, no Basin, no problems. No problems except for the one that Sara knew she had to raise tonight. They had reservations at their favorite restaurant tonight, the “Old Dillon Inn.” Tacos, Enchiladas, Tortillas and Dos Equis beer were the house specialties. Tom was not a big eater, but when he did, it was in his style. He loved to cook when he had the time. Sara was overjoyed when he surprised her with a five- course dinner. It had been complete with candles and wine for their first date.

 

     The conversation was light as they made their way across the small town. Tom was driving Sara’s vintage 69 Volkswagen Beetle. He was thinking about Joe’s empty future and felt the same for himself. Sara was seeing a future full of Tom and all her dreams. She was hoping it was true. They pulled into the parking lot to find it was full.

     “Look at this place,” Tyler inched the bug in. “I wouldn’t mind owning a place like this myself.”

     “We could make a fortune,” Sara attempted to spur the conversation on.

     “We’d need a lot of capital up front,” Tom reached for her hand. They walked toward the front door.

     “I’ve got some money saved,” she offered, “maybe we could find some investors. What about Joe? He’ll have a lot after the Basin is gone.”

     Tom fell silent. Sara knew she had said the wrong thing. She immediately changed the subject.

     ‘You could run the kitchen. I’ll handle the bar. Maybe we'll find a place for Jilly.”

     “They laughed as Tom opened the door for her. The restaurant was full, he gave their names to the hostess and they made their way to the bar.

     “At least twenty minutes,” Tom said as he handed Sara a Molson Gold.

     “That’s perfect, the anticipation will raise our pleasure even more.” She gave him a wink knowing he had caught her analogy.

     “Tom would you marry me?” she suddenly said, half hoping he would take her seriously.

 He was silent for a moment.

     “You’re supposed to get down on your knees when you ask that question.”

 She was beginning to enjoy the game so she went on.

     “Please, I love you. We could buy a house and make lots of babies,” she smiled hopefully.

     “And live happily ever after,” he added, not sure that she was kidding anymore.

     “ You’re serious aren’t you?”

When she didn’t reply and looked away he knew she was.

     “Sara,” he said, shaking his head, “Look at me.”

She looked into his eyes.

     “I have nothing to give you. All I own are my mountain memories and the clothes in my backpack, that’s no way to start a life.”

Sara looked down at the floor feeling lost like she was the only one in the room.

     “Don’t lose this one Sara Lyn,” a voice in her head said. “I really love you Tom, anybody else would be second best. I’m not asking for the world Tom, just you.”

 He looked over at the bottles lined up behind the bar searching for an answer. This was all so sudden but he knew it was right.  Never having felt this way about anyone, but marriage, children, a house in the country, those things were not in his plan.

     “I’m just not ready Sara,” he said finally, “you don’t know how hard this is.”

     “I do know how hard this is. Now you look at me, Tom Dillon!“ she snapped with real determination in her voice. “I know you Tom. I know the kind of man you are. No past, no future, just the here and now. That’s fine if it’s what you want out of life. I’m involved and I love you deeply, but I cannot live your life. I’m offering a life with you because I know it’s right.  You do also. I can’t live my life not knowing what will be.”

He felt helpless and reached to take her hand. She pulled away looking around at the other couples having their conversations, wondering if any of them felt as miserable as she did.

     “I’m sorry baby,” he looked at her. He was looking for a sign that she might be softening. She was distant and he felt like he didn’t even know her.

     “Dillon, table for two, Dillon,” the voice over the intercom cracked.

     “I’m not very hungry Tom. I have to go.”

She finished her beer and slid it across the bar.

     “I need my keys,” she held out her hand.

He gave them to her and she turned without a word. He watched her as she made her way through the crowd and out the door. He gestured to the bartender for another beer. Tom felt old for the very first time in his life.

Bhajelo-ji Hanuman, Krishna Das Music, Greatest Hits of the Kali Yuga

153;Uncle Albert's Mountain,(The Lure; )Chapter XX; The Corporate Offices and The Takeover

 

     Denver was less than an hours drive and she was already on her third cigarette. This meeting was everything to her. It would show the real powers in Summit County just what she was made of. She wasn’t proud of the way she had arrived at this prestigious position. Everyone does it she thought. Why shouldn’t she? She hoped Daddy never finds out. He wouldn’t like her sleeping with one of his business associates. If he ever learned the truth, he could easily destroy all the plans she had made. Her mother had cheated on him several years before. It had never been the same. If he had only known how many times she had slept around, he wouldn’t have taken her back. She would be lucky if he had let her live. You don’t mess with Daddy.

 

     She turned down Speer Boulevard toward the twelve story glass and steel Corporate Offices of the Senator, approaching the building where the takeover was being designed. A young valet took her car at the entrance, and she walked in to the elevator past the reception desk as the young woman behind it smiled and said, ”He’s expecting you.”

The door slid open as she approached clutching her briefcase tightly and stepped in. The elevator was empty. Jilly pressed the Loft Button, where number twelve should be. She rode up planning her strategy. Her black dress was smart well groomed but not sexy. Sex was the last thing she wanted them to notice. It was what had gotten her through the door, her abilities would have to do the rest. She would be pleasant but not seductively so. The older Board members would see right through her, her most attractive attribute would have to be confidence. She had the drive and the heart to be the best, but she also had all the fine trimmings. The right combination of each would take her to the Top. The elevator came to the top and the doors slid open. Jilly stepped out and saw people running in every direction. They were checking their watches and carrying stacks of papers. It was frantic with people trying to keep the offices moving along smoothly. Loving to see people working hard, it gave her a deep sense of security. This is the way I’m going to run the Basin, she thought. No one will slack off on my team.

 

     Jilly walked down the long grey corridor passed the many different branches of the corporate giant. Each small cubicle was alive, crawling with activity. Every cubicle performing its own function, each worker a drone performing there task. She noticed there were very few decorations, anywhere. She felt a stark coldness in the cubes were the single purpose was only------work. Walking into the main office at the end of the hallway, the receptionist looked up. She eyed her coldly but it was pleasant. Jilly sat and waited for her moment of truth. She watched her chewing and snapping her gum, answering her phone and taking memos.

 

     “What a sleaze,” she thought,” I wonder how she got this job?”

     “They’ll see you now, last door on the right.”

Jilly stood without saying a word. She stopped briefly at the wooden door. Meeting room #1 was etched into the polished brass plate. She adjusted her scarf, and buttoned the next higher button on her blouse. Smoothing the wrinkles in her skirt she took a deep breath and closed the door behind her.

     “Gentlemen,” she smiled, looking each of them directly in the eye. Walking to the head of the long table, she laid her briefcase in front of her. Clicking open the two latches, she removed her documents. She raised her head to look at them, although this time she did not smile.

Sita Ram; Krishnabai, Jai Sahaja; Mooji Mala Music

152;Uncle Albert's Mountain,( The Lure;) Chapter XIX, LANCE

      The barren one room apartment at the top of the stairs was stark and cold. The stained sheets on the single bed were crumpled and unmade as usual. A table with chairs sat against the opposite wall. On the top of the table a large glass ashtray was overflowing with cigarette butts and empty gum wrappers. A tin of Skoal sat alongside three empty beer cans. They were stacked in a pyramid. In the third draw of the dresser, by the only window was a 38 midnight special, a german luger, and a 44 magnum, all loaded. The front wall by the door was covered with posters and newspaper clippings pertaining to the Vietnam War. A few foldouts of pin up girls, gave a sharp contrast of images in the room. It radiated a disturbing feeling for the eclectic nature of the designer. In the fourth drawer buried beneath a pile of dingy grey underwear were the timer, electrical cord and plastic explosives.

     Lance Berry was sitting cross-legged on a pillow against the empty wall across from the door. Although his eyes were closed, he was wide-awake. He had been sitting communing with whatever thoughts flashed through his mind for over two hours. A peaceful look accentuated the rugged features that you would hardly notice. Deep dark eyes, and a once broken nose sat above  a thin straight mouth that never smiled, his body, a well oiled machine, hard and strong. It was ready for whatever might be demanded of it. He added more and more lines to the page as an incredibly scaled drawing of Arapahoe Basin began to appear. Lance knew every square foot of the area and transferred that image in his mind to the paper in front of him. In detailed precision he captured every structure from the lift towers to the lodge. He sketched in caricatures representing people at different positions on the map. In a corner he wrote: A-Basin, 4-1-78 3:45 PM. Sitting back he stared at his work and was scanning it for mistakes, tapping his pencil obsessively on his leg. Assured of his perfection, he grabbed the warm can of beer from the table and finished it in one gulp. Neatly, he stacked it up against the other four, grabbing his Skoal he pinched out a portion and tucked it into his cheek. Turning his attention to his drawing, he examined it carefully and after a few moments he took his pencil and made a large X through the Number Three Lift Station.

     “Stick to your Politics Senator and leave the mountains to the Mountain Men. You think just because all the other people in the Valley laid down at your feet, I’m going to. You’ve got a rude awakening. I’ll blow the whole mountain, before I see you get it.”

The Ring Song, Krishna Das, Pilgrim Heart

151-Uncle Albert's Mountain,(The Lure Of The Mountain King;) Chapter XVIII; The Betrayal

        “Yes Sir. I’ve already taken care of that.”

     General Matthew Dowe was sitting at attention behind his polished oak desk. There aren’t many men a General in the United States Army has to answer to, but he was talking to one now.

     “I sent you a memo the last time he called. There was no reason to bother you with it, then. He was hoping he could make this conversation as short as possible.

     “This time he wants action. Well what should I do? Yes, I already have someone on the inside.

     He covered the receiver and took a long deep breath. Thank God this is over the phone, he thought to himself. He wasn’t up to a confrontation with this man.

     “Yes Sir. I realize that. I won’t do anything then. Sorry to bother you.”

    

     The connection broke before he could get those last words out. He hung up the phone and clasped his hands on the desktop in front of him. Betraying a friend was not his style. He hated it, but he had no choice. Besides there were no friends in business or war, these days those concepts were interchangeable. You can’t have one without the other. The only difference is the battles are fought with pen and paper, not guns and soldiers.

 

     The General opened the bottom drawer, and took out a bottle of twelve-year old scotch. He poured himself a stiff glass half full. He sat back and took a big long drink, rolling the golden liquid around his tongue.

     “There’s no room in this world anymore for friends,” he said to no one. He finished the drink in one gulp, and refilled the glass.

     “Good Luck Joe!,” he raised his glass to his former friend. 

HARE KRISHNA MEDITATION

150;Uncle Albert's Mountain,( The Lure Of The Mountain King;) Chapter XVII, The Corporate Lawyers

      It’s a fair offer Joe”

Joe was standing motionless with his back to his lawyer, staring out the window. It was a fair offer but that wasn’t the point.

     “How the hell can you sit there and tell me that. God Dammit! You’re supposed to be on my side.”

     Joe walked around to the front of the desk, and sat down in one of the three leather chairs. They were all facing John Staller, Joe’s attorney of thirty years.

     “Give me a break, huh. I’m on your side. I’m a realist. We’ve held on for a long time because you have friends in high places. You’ve got to understand, Joe, they’re gone, and now the Senator is the Valley. He owns or controls everything.”

     “The Senator is not the issue here. I shouldn’t have to sell him anything.”

     “Jesus Joe, will you wake up. The Senator is the issue. He takes whatever he want s because he owns the whole frigging valley, it's all gone cept you, Joe. They’ve convinced everyone you’re an eccentric old crazy fool who wants to live out his last days at the “Top of the World.”
    Joe let out a chuckle.

     “Sometimes I feel like I am John. I feel like I’m beating my head against an unbreakable concrete ceiling.”

     “Listen! I understand what this means to you. You worked your entire life to own the Basin. It’s gone, like most of the great men of the Tenth Mountain Armor Division, you can’t fight them any longer. When that team of Corporate Whore Lawyers come back in, they will be expecting only one answer Joe.”

 

     Joe stood up, tucked his khaki shirt into his denims and went to the window. He stood looking toward the summit of the big basin. Even from this distance it rose piercing the skies. He shook his head.

     “Send them back in, he whispered, barely audible.”

The Mountain Chalisa, Krishna Das, Flow of Grace